The Best Catfights on Television

There comes a time in one's life, when the nights get lonely and long. One full proof way to help the night pass is to relive some of the greatest catty moments played out on the big and small screen. I could spend huge amounts of time filling the follow post up with clips from dozens of movies and television shows, but I've managed to make a particular selection with the following clips.

Some of the greatest catfights you'll ever see were on the 80s mega hit series Dynasty. Dynasty is like a cross between Desperate Housewives and The Bold and the Beautiful. And if you don't know any of these shows either, then you have some much needed viewing to do. Thanks to Foxtel, I've been a viewer of Dynasty since I was about 10. The moments that stay with me are, of course, the catfights. And the best ones always seemed to involve Joan Collins' multiple marrying character Alexis Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan. I've provided two of the best Alexis catfights there is. But believe me, there's plenty more where that came from. If the fake slapping and over the top sound effects aren't enough, then enjoy the 80s fashions.

The Alexis/Dominique Catfight


The ULTIMATE Dynasty Catfight


Dynasty helped lead the way for female vs. female catfighting. It's influences spread across many more television shows for many decades since, and for many decades to come. I've chosen some favourite moments showcasing the Dynasty influence. An honourable mention goes to the Molly Shannon-Raquel Welch-Julia Louis Dreyfus catfight in the season 8 Seinfeld episode "Summer of George".

Thanks to the folks at youtube for this beautiful collection of the greatest hits (PUN PUN PUN!!!!!!) from bitch filled super drama Melrose Place


What's better than two women fighting, one asks? When one is a nun. Thank the holy lord!


While being more famously known as a quirky, neurotic stlyised lawyer comedy series, Ally McBeal did feature one marvelous catfight scene in the uni-sex bathroom that racked up a tally of 4 fighters.


A golden movie moment captured from the silver screen adaptation of Jacqueline Susann's best selling novel of the 1960's Valley of the Dolls. (Not a TV moment and it predated Dynasty, but it's irresistible)


Here's an extra tidbit-spoof from the 90s classic sitcom The Nanny


But let's not forget the wonderful verbal catfights, seen best during the Rosie days at The View


And finally, let's take the words "cat-fight" just a bit more seriously for a second:

Burton's Wonderland

If you haven't heard by now, prolific director Tim Burton has filmed an adaption of Lewis Carrol's famous novel Alice in Wonderland. It's now in the post production stages, and very recently, stills of the film were popped up on the internet.

And now we can enjoy them. Johnny Depp (The Mad Hatter), Helena Bonham Carter (The Queen) and Anne Hathaway (The White Witch) featured below.

Chk Chk Boom - The Album

According to Sydney Confidential, Clare the bogan (aka girl with the fabricated Kings Cross shooting story a few weeks ago) is heading into the recording studios to make some muzak!

Apparently she's headed in with some songwriters, and some gems are going to be produced, with no doubt many references, perhaps even a song, to the "Chk Chk Boom" slogan that she has become internationally famous for.

Lord help us. But there's a part of me that can't wait!

Jamie Foxx to play Frank Sinatra

What could be the biggest piece of colour-blind casting in Hollywood history, Oscar winner Jamie Foxx is supposedly tipped to play Frank Sinatra in the upcoming Martin Scorsese helmed biopic, just recently greenlit.

Other actors supposedly up for the highly saught after role include singer turned actor Harry Connick Jr and frequent Scorsese collaborator Leonardo Di Caprio. Foxx, 41, most famoulsy known for his Oscar winning role as music legend Ray Charles, is being called the perfect bit of casting.

Playing Ray Charles might not have been that much of a stretch, but Ol' Blue Eyes? Seriously! Let's get real for a second and acknowledge the elephant in the room. He's black. Sinatra was white. Wow! I'm just dropping truth bombs everywhere, aren't i?!? Perhaps the Robert Downey Jr role in Tropic Thunder had some serious effects on those Hollywood power meetings.

I can only guess who'll be cast as the members of the Rat Pack, and other members of the famous Sinatra clan. I predict here and now that Halle Berry will play Nancy Sinatra, Eminem will play Sammy Davis Jr and Beyonce will play Mia Farrow. With the Foxx casting, it almost credible, if not consistent.

Articles have been surfacing all over the internet within the last couple of days, prompting a gossip-rumour frenzy. "Are we being punk'd?" one site ponders. Is this just another prank? Or is it seemingly legit, just like our friend Joaquin's hip hop career? We'll soon find out.

Britney's Va jay jay Malfunction

Oops, she did it again!

In a world full of frequent wardrobe malfunctions, troubled pop diva Britney Spears was recently heard uttering the words "My pussy is hanging out" at a concert, which thanks to the wonderfully advanced technologically charged aged world that we live in, was captured on video camera footage.

This brings a timely reminder to the wonderful world of wardrobe malfunctions. Let us remember two important wardrobe malfunction-ees of the last few years:

Axel Whitehead
Former Australian Idol runner up, and current Cleo Bachelor of the Year and Home and Away star, exposed himself at the 2006 ARIA awards, thus prompting his firing from music show Video Hits.

Janet Jackson
One of the famous Jacksons caused what is now referred to as "Nipplegate" at the 2004 Superbowl in the US, which thus prompted FFC regulations to bring in a 7 second delay which would deprive us of more similar moments. Jackson claimed to be unaware of what was going on, but later admitted to be responsible for the slippage of boobage.



And now for the clip of the moment: (The gold moment occurs around the 33 second mark.)

Scarlet Johansson Dumped

Scarlett Johansson's directorial debut has been axed from the upcoming feature film New York, I Love You, a follow up to the 2006 collection of short films Paris je't aime (Paris, I Love You.) A variety of directors and actors had made little short segments for the upcoming film (including Zack Braft, Natalie Portman, Brett Ratner and Shekhar Kapur.) The segment, starring Kevin Bacon, was apparently not fitting for the rest of the film, and will now only be included as a DVD extra.

Now this is not the first career failure Scarlett has endured. Let us not forget her 2008 debut album of Tom Waits covers Anywhere I Lay My Head. If you haven't seen it, or need reminding, check out this clip. I'll let the music (or for lack of a better word) speak for itself.

Julia Roberts and her F*&? filled Tom Hanks speech

This just in!

Julia Roberts gives an expletive filled speech at a tribute to Tom Hanks in New York on Monday night (New York time, obviously).

It pretty much speaks for itself. It's a bit of a roast and less a toast (i.e. raise your glasses for the bride and the groom), which is always refreshing when you're dealing with someone with the star level magnitude of Tom Hanks. So sit back and enjoy this foul mouthed tirade! And a suggestion for Roberts. I think she needs to give another heartfelt impassioned speech to someone else on a similar A list high power level. And that person might be Oprah.